HOT GIRLS LOVE TACO BELL

It’s a fact. I know, it defies all logic. Taco Bell looks gross, smells gross, is gross - and is disgustingly terrible for you. But without fail, any time I’m in a car, late at night, that contains at least one cute girl, we will stop at TBell. They have to be drunk of course, otherwise their weight phoebias will prevent them from indulging. I estimate that 79% of Taco Bell’s revenue is generated from hot, drunk college girls. What is even more fascinating is that fat girls do not like it. In fact, they seem to hate it. Whoever runs Taco Bell most be some sort of mad scientist, as they have created a wonder tonic. Its amazing, and I think I will now litter my front yard with chalupas. Without sour cream.